Eternally the Bride of Christ
By Lisa Logan
From the age of three I knew that I wanted to be bride. I saw the beautiful women in their wedding gowns as my family attended marriage ceremony after marriage ceremony. Despite not knowing the meaning of this wondrous vocation, I draped towels over my heading pretending it was a veil. Then, as I grew older, I imagined the day I would look down and see my white flowy dress draping over my white shoes as I walked down the aisle. This identity of a one-day-bride to a holy groom comforted me as I held my chest in pain heartbreak after heartbreak.
Now as my wedding dress is folded up in a box, and the laughter and joy of our wedding day is a dear and cherished memory, the holy-yet-ordinary family life has become my present. The dust has settled on a one-day bride and newlywed bliss. Although I still shed a tear or two from the goodness of the Lord in granting my heart’s desire, challenges come, moving countries hasn’t gotten easier, chores never end and dishes seem to endlessly pile up.
Leading up to the wedding day, you have an identity. For years and months, you plan, hope and idealize. Whether it’s simply imagining your groom, swapping last names, planning flower arrangements and ordering dresses. You long to be united to your beloved, and oh the joy that fills your heart when you finally exchange vows. Even so, the day quickly passes, honeymoon ends, and ordinary life begins. It’s not that you’re selfish, it’s the years of investment into an identity, a one-day-bride identity, that seems you will never retrieve.
I must say, that prior to the wedding I was not naïve and I knew the hardships of marriage. I knew the difficulty that was awaiting me in leaving behind my home country, and my spouse knew the trials that awaited him caring for a wife with a chronic disease. Yet, even in the knowledge of servitude and approaching the cross on our wedding day, the difficult transition following the marriage union is not often spoken about. The adjustment and changes that followed me for 10 months has been enough bury even the most divine wedding day memories.
Maybe you can relate to this feeling. The newness of married life bliss slipping from your grasp as you swim in a sea of change. The reality is, married life continues to grow and deepen with time, and so do you as a person. This feeling of a lost identity points to something greater, that only Christ is our identity. No matter how many times you were to experience your wedding day, you would always long for something greater, and that is eternity.
As my incredible husband Steve and I were walking out to the car the other day, he ran out in front of me, opened the car door and said, “for you, my bride.” And this he does, every time to remind me of the beauty of our call.
Dear sister, if this is something you are grappling with as you return home from your honeymoon, as you do your fifth pile of laundry, or wake up to a crying newborn, it’s okay. Walking out of those church doors into the ordinary and into your new role as a wife and mother is good. Imagining and idealizing white frills is easy and dreamy, but it’s the hard strides of saying yes to your marriage vocation that truly matters.
It’s the ordinary, simple, joyous and difficult moments that pave the way to heaven.
You are loved, adored, holy and desired. You are a daughter, sister, friend, mother, wife and a bride to your beloved spouse. Most of all, whether married or not, you are Jesus’ bride and that you will be for all of eternity.