By: Alexis M.
Hey lovely readers, my name is Alexis and this is my very first post on Made4More. I am currently studying English at university and am excited to share my thoughts with you as a small-town Michigander finding her way around Toronto. In the thick of exams, it is hard to envision a trajectory that doesn’t solely consist of readings and flashcards and many mugs of (insert your favorite caffeinated beverage here). Although I love myself a nice warm cup of liquid life, when it’s mixed with worries of tests and research papers and whether or not I’ll have time to squeeze in an episode of The Office I find myself drudging through sleepless nights. If you are feeling exhausted from whatever may be troubling you at the moment, I thought I’d write a little bit about seeking that much needed rest from our Lord.
Restlessness often begins with feeling out of place, out of body, like Peter Pan searching around for his shadow but having trouble catching it. Brewing anxieties can make me forget how to respond to simple questions, and leave me stumped on how to answer: “How are you doing?” and “What time is it?” Anxieties can also make speaking from the heart feel as vulnerable as treading deep waters that push and pull and tug and toil without anything in sight to clutch onto. Even internal prayer becomes muddled with confusions and prodding taunts. Hugging a rosary and mentally reciting each Hail Mary is like trudging through murky mire, rambling notions clouding over each word and morphing them into troublesome thoughts. This often forces me to speak the delicate pleadings to the Blessed Mother aloud, making my lips physically form the words so that my soul can be soothed, forcing away the crippling darkness, allowing light to shine through the cracks and crevices that have stealthily chipped open overtime.
“O soul steeped in darkness, do not despair. All is not yet lost. Come and confide in your God, who is love and mercy,” St. Faustina.
Sweet friends, no matter the seemingly impenetrable weight of our anxieties, God’s love for you is more powerful than any of the entangling thoughts that leave you feeling restless. The unceasing love from Our Father, this warm, gentle, merciful compassion outlasts each of the trials that torture our scattered minds. I envision His love as a force field of light and guidance carrying me through the darkness of my wavering trust.
With all that is drained of me in a period of anxiety, it can be hard to uncover the good within myself. I must keep reminding myself that The Lord sees the good always and forever within us. Even when we feel as though there is no spark of energy left, He knows our beautiful capabilities.
It is okay to feel tired. It is okay to feel alone. It is okay to feel weak. These things will not prevent us from regaining our strength over and over again. Remember, we must allow ourselves to rest in order to build up that endurance once more.
As we approach Easter and the promise of the Resurrection, let us caress the truth that an everlasting life with Him outweighs all that burdens us here on earth. Picture resting your head in His loving, outstretched embrace. Ask the Holy Spirit to calm you in those bleak moments that seem unsurmountable. Whether you need to write it over and over in a journal, whisper it until you fall asleep, or lovingly share it with someone in your life that needs it the most: You are so wondrously, immaculately, and eternally loved by Him.