A Letter to My Younger Self
If I were to write a letter to my younger self, after now growing up and learning from life’s lessons it would likely be something like this:
Dearest sweet girl,
Do you not see your great worth and beauty? That you spend your days and nights dreaming of a perfect love that will fulfill your heart, yet you have set your sights on mortal man, whom cannot fully quench that thirst within you?
I know you do not understand that last question yet, but one day you will. You will see that no person can accomplish the famous line in the movie Jerry McGuire that almost every girl who first watched it wants to hear from a guy: “You complete me”.
There is a desire deep within us that yearns to be truly and perfectly loved. There is a hunger and thirst that calls out for recognition. To be known. Yet we seek this acceptance in other human beings. Which is not really fair. If we were really honest with ourselves and admitted our weaknesses, we would understand right away that we could not put an expectation on someone else to fulfill our every desire and make us happy. For that is just not possible.
It has taken me a long time to realize the answer to the deep ache within my heart and soul. It would not be fulfilled by meeting my “knight in shining armor”. It first had to come from learning how to love myself apart from being in a dating relationship. I had to take a journey hand in hand with the only One who knows my inner being, every aspect. The One who created me before the foundations of the earth and holds in His heart perfect love which casts out all fear.
Perhaps sweet girl, this may be one of the scariest journeys you will have to embark upon…but it is what your heart truly desires. It is to come and know the living waters which spring into eternal life. The overflowing Well of Life that never runs out. I know you have this answer deep within your heart, but yet you have been running away in fear of what life would be like if you had to face it on your own. Without the comfort of having someone there, so that you may feel loved (even if it’s only a shadow of the kind of love you hoped for) Thus you are tempted to settle for less than your true worth.
Yet I promise you little one, there is so much more than what you have experienced thus far. The heart breaks and disappointments. The pain and disillusionment. That is not the plan that God has for you. He has plans for a hope and a future and His word always accomplishes what it is sent out to do. And thus, do not lose hope. Hold on to Jesus’ hand that reaches out to you, to lift you from the mire. He will teach you what it is to be a true lady in waiting and not get lost in the daydreams of the perfect man who will sweep you off your feet.
Darling, the revelation that will be bestowed upon you is that marriage’s purpose is to be a foreshadowing of heaven, of the selfless giving unconditional love of God. For you to understand and be ready to accept this, you need to come to know what real love is like first so that you may recognize it when God does introduce you to your husband one day. That you will recognize what unconditional love looks like, feels like, tastes like. And that in return that you may love fully as well, in the love that God has bestowed upon your little heart.
Do not fret or worry. Do not be afraid that you will never find another person like the other guys you have dated. God has so much more for you. I promise. God never disappoints anyone and He has your heart in His hands. Will you give God a chance? Give Him your aching heart with all of it’s hopes and desires? For I promise you there is more adventure than you could ever imagine when you come to know the true heart and love of the Father. He will fulfill your heart more than any human being could and He will prepare you for your future calling.
Oh sweet young one. I know you don’t fully understand. Yet ask and ye will receive. Knock and the door shall be opened.
I love you and I’m praying for you. You will see clearly. Very soon. But you need to let go of the past. To forgive and be brave and courageous for God has your heart in His hands. He will teach you how to love as you walk with Him hand in hand. Give Him this time. He has been waiting for you for so long my little one. Do not look to man any longer to fulfill your heart. I promise the “gift of perfect love” is real. It will overwhelm and encompass your heart and be greater than any human love you have ever experienced. It is from this well of deep love and compassion, that your light will shine brightly and you will stand tall knowing who you are….
A Beloved Daughter Of the Most High King – Jesus.
Love always. I’m rooting for you!